


Count Me In

by Onlyendsonce



Category: Lost
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-28
Updated: 2018-03-01
Packaged: 2018-11-05 23:56:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11024259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Onlyendsonce/pseuds/Onlyendsonce
Summary: Despite her borrowed clothes, lack of makeup and the slightly annoyed pinch of her face, she was still his absolute favorite thing to look at. In truth, Jack felt a little selfish but wasted time had withered his ability to deny it. He wanted her all to himself as long as possible. The outside world, the court, the law be damned. A chronicle of the time between the Oceanic 6 press conference and Something Nice Back Home. Because we all want to know.





	1. The Day After the Press Conference

**Author's Note:**

> I can't believe that this show has been off the air for 7 years. I wrote these one shots over a year ago during my last re-watch. I've got at least three written but I can't say how many more might come. Jate is still my all time OTP and I hope you enjoy these as much I loved writing them.

He watched her sleep, the rare LA rain casting dappled dots across her still face through the window pane. She’d hate that he was doing this, foregoing rest in favor of watching over her. That was exactly why he waited until he’d heard her stop tossing. Stepping into the room, Jack had made sure Aaron’s pillow fort on the bed kept him from rolling away and then he’d taken up residence on a lumpy love seat a few feet from Kate.

  
It was a testament to the trials of the last two weeks that she hadn’t stirred as he eased the door open and tiptoed across the room. Maybe because, for once, she had no worries of him trekking off into the unknown without her. For now, they were safe at his childhood home. Would be welcomed for as long as his mother wanted to fuss over them.

  
The relief of finishing the press conference, of pulling off the lie, had been short lived for Kate. One second, Jack had been connected to her by a light touch on her back, intent on guiding her and Aaron back to the plane which would take them to the mainland. The next, two marshals flanked her, wedging themselves into that trusted space between Jack and Kate.

  
“Miss Austen, a word,” the younger marshal had intoned with a slight threat of warning.

  
Kate spoke; her voice conveying a steadiness modicums greater than Jack possessed while panic rose up in him unbidden. They were supposed to have time.

  
“I was told I’d have some leniency given the circumstances.”

  
“You will. We just want to go over the terms of your stay of conviction once more.”

  
“Okay,” she nodded and the older marshal started to lead her away.

  
“Kate.” The syllable wrestled out of Jack’s mouth unwillingly, strangled.

  
She turned back to him, taking in the worried line of his brow, the tension in his shoulders, the slight heave of his chest, how his tie flapped in the tropical breeze. Sayid and Hurley were steps away. Kate could tell the former torturer was ready to spring into calm pacifier mode at any second, bandying Jack’s emotions with his logic. It was imperative that the doctor, the leader, the voice of the group, remain composed in order for their façade to hold.

  
_I’m not leaving without you_ rang through her head and she knew what he needed. Wrapping her hand around his wrist, she met Jack halfway, pulling him down to her level. His eyes, jumping from face to nearby face, settled on hers and held there. They always communicated best by sight alone.

  
“It’s fine. Wait for me here?” She squeezed his arm until his grip slackened and let her fingers trail through his lightly. “Don’t leave without me.”

  
Kate let the corners of her mouth turn up. She was only teasing. Jack caught on and took a step back, allowing himself a nod.

  
On the couch in his mother’s guest room, the surgeon came back to the present, huffing out the sting of his prior anxiety. He must have walked back and forth in front of the hangar doors a hundred times waiting for her. Kate stirred, rolling towards him and blinking in the darkness.

  
“Jack?” she said roughly. She opened the fingers of her left hand toward him, beckoning.  
Drawn to her like a magnet as always, he crept to the bed. He knelt with arms crossed on the sheets, like a priest before the altar, hardly a foot away.

  
“Hey,” he breathed, a corner of his mouth quirking shyly. He unfolded his right arm to rub a thumb gently across the apple of her cheek. Mostly free of the island’s bonds and prying eyes, Jack marveled at his newfound freedom to touch her and the liberty she allowed him.

  
“I’m sorry I woke you.” Kate shook her head minutely as her only answer, as if to say no apology required.

  
“How long have you been doing this?” Her voice was still sleep addled but her question was clear.

  
“About an hour.”

“Liar.” Green eyes squinted at the corners, knowing she’d caught him.

  
“Since the Searcher, whenever I could.”

  
“I’m not going to vanish Jack.”

  
_I’m done running_ was implied but she couldn’t say it yet. Almost.

  
Kate swung her legs over the side of the bed. Without ceremony, he wrapped his arms around her thin waist, tucked his head into her stomach. Jack stayed there as she rubbed a soothing pattern on the back of his neck. Even though she was the one giving comfort, she felt wholly safe. No matter what the confusion, the conflict, the struggle had been, he was alive and breathing into her shirt, his skilled hands gripping it at the back. She was alive and he saved her, along with the child sleeping without bother. Jack’s breathing slowed. With new gentleness, she pulled him by the arm until he laid beside her. This time, he fell asleep under her watchful gaze.

The sun’s reappearance after a night of rain woke Kate slowly. She startled when she realized both Jack and Aaron had left the bed. Quelling fear, she forced herself to breathe, went to the bathroom and pulled a robe on over her sleep shirt, a borrowed old baseball T-shirt of Jack’s.

  
For the first time in the light of day, she marveled at the Shephard mansion. It was elegantly decorated but didn’t lack homey elements. Along the staircase was a timeline of Jack’s milestones from first steps to medical school graduation. She admired each photo in turn, pausing and smiling at his gawky teenage years. A clamor and muffled curse from the kitchen snapped her out of her revelry.

  
Aaron, barricaded by pillows, slept soundly on a brown suede couch in the adjoining sitting room. Still awed by the new swell of maternal instinct rising in her chest, she tread carefully past him. Her real target had his back turned to the kitchen archway, intent on something on the counter. Jack wore a loose white t-shirt over his relaxed shoulders and grey sweatpants. She leaned against the door frame, admiring the view for a beat before walking over to stand a few feet from him.

  
“Hey,” she said softly. He barely startled, his only tell being that he set down the knife he was using to chop peppers.

  
They held eye contact for a moment, then broke it as a blush bloomed on their cheeks. Jack blushed as he remembered his earlier open display of affection, Kate because of the adoration he wasn’t trying to hide.

  
“Where’s your mom?” Kate asked.

  
“She went out to get Aaron some things, warm clothes, baby monitors,” Jack answered.

  
“She didn’t have to do that. Really.”

  
“There was no talking her out of it, I promise. Hard to stop her when she’s got somebody to take care of,” Jack shrugged.

  
“Sounds familiar. What’re you cooking?”

  
“Veggie scramble and pancakes. You weren’t supposed to wake up by the way.” His brow furrowed in mock anger but the lightness in his voice betrayed him. She made a promise to herself then, to invoke that lightness in him a hundred times, a thousand times, to outweigh the darkness of the last three months.

  
Kate’s face split in a grin and she sidled up to stand right at his hip, their shoulders just brushing. They diced, mixed and stirred in companionable silence for a few minutes.

  
“I was thinking,” Jack started, “that we might go to my apartment today. I need some clothes and really, living with my mom should just be temporary for us so I need to get the power turned back on and all that.”

  
He looked up to catch Kate’s nod. She tried to keep in her relief that he had no intention of ditching her soon.

  
“And I need to get my phone reactivated,” Jack continued with confidence, “and I want to get you one too.”

  
“Jack, you don’t-“

  
“Yeah, I do Kate,” he responded with boldness, setting down his knife and turning to face her. Despite her borrowed clothes, lack of makeup and the slightly annoyed pinch of her face, she was still his absolute favorite thing to look at. In truth, Jack felt a little selfish but wasted time had withered his ability to deny it. He wanted her all to himself as long as possible. The outside world, the court, the law be damned.

  
“Let me take care of you,” his hazel eyes bore into her green, trying to get a message across that was still too tender to put into words. That had been unsettled by the normality of being off the island.

  
Kate softened at the last statement and smiled a little. Pushing up on her toes and cupping his face, she kissed him sweetly, just once and for the first time on U.S. soil.

  
“Okay,” she said, nodding, trailing a thumb down his scruffy cheek. They fell back into the routine of prepping breakfast.

  
Jack felt emboldened by her lack of fight and made even braver by her kiss. So, he added a playful, “Besides, you don’t have any money.”

  
Kate’s rebuttal was a spoonful of pancake batter splattered on Jack’s cheek. And soon, the kitchen was an absolute mess but the perpetrators couldn’t have cared less, so wrapped up in each other and all the possibilities ahead.


	2. 6 Weeks in L.A.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long, LONG gap between chapters. As always, let me know what you think and/or hit kudos! Puts a smile on my face and it's good to be reminded that other people still love my OTP!

Jack walked into the front door of his apartment around lunch time. It was quiet, but not eerily so. Aaron was for the most part a good baby but he’d caught a bug, putting Kate on edge. 

Setting down the groceries and removing his winter coat, Jack made his way through his once sterile living space. Aside from a few pictures, it had been almost bereft of personal touches when he asked, almost pleaded with Kate to move in with him. Now, Aaron’s baby bouncer occupied its own corner, Kate’s magazines were strewn across the table and she was gradually sneaking photos and framing them for the walls. It was comfortably untidy and completely unlike the home he’d grown up in. 

Jack picked up on a low noise from Kate’s bedroom and pushed the door open slowly. She sat in a rocking chair facing the door, Aaron sound asleep in her arms. He discerned that she was humming Catch a Falling Star before she felt him in the room and looked up. 

“Hey,” she whispered, smiling, careful not to move. 

“Hey,” Jack replied and came over to rub a hand across Aaron’s forehead. He wasn’t as hot or fussy as he’d been all night. “He seems better. Come have lunch with me?” he asked, holding out his hand to steady her. She took it, placed Aaron in his crib and stood watching him. 

Jack felt a familiar surge of longing in his chest. A small part of him wanted the freedom to walk behind her, wrap her in his arms and kiss her hello. He felt them inching closer to that intimacy every day but it was still too soon. That aching bit of him yearned to look down in the crib with her at their sleeping child. _Still getting ahead of yourself_ , he thought. They were only just readjusting to the real world and Kate was learning to be a mother. All they’d shared in their month off island was a few kisses and embraces. For now, he was content to just be in her presence almost every hour of the day, to slowly get to know all the ordinary aspects of Kate Austen. They had time for once. 

He asked her not to be too long and pulled the door shut behind him. One thing Jack did know was that Kate hated tomato sauce. He pulled their takeout from its bag, plating his lasagna and her alfredo. While he poured water for both of them, Kate emerged from the guest room, tying her hair up off her neck. She sniffed the air appreciatively and rounded the counter to look at lunch. 

“Yum. Thank you.” She kissed the underside of his jaw in gratitude. He loved that she had to rise up on her toes to get level with him. They settled on the couch, debating what to watch until Kate stopped on a Friends rerun.

“You know, “Jack started through a mouthful of pasta, “we should try to get with the times. Watch something current.”

“Jack, you didn’t even own a TV a month ago. I grew up without cable. I don’t think we’re meant to be pop culture gurus. I know I like this show anyway. Gotta start small.” 

Kate caught his eye. He nodded and smiled with his mouth closed. She had just a bit of sauce on her lower lip and Jack could not help himself. He swallowed hard, leaned in close to her. So carefully, he swiped his thumb over the spot, then licked it from his finger. Kate couldn’t take her eyes off him. The surgeon seized the opportunity, cleanly stabbing a few noodles off her plate. With it halfway to his mouth, Kate snapped out of it, slapping his hand. His utensil landed on her plate, the noodles reclaimed. Jack shot her a fake wounded look. 

“I don’t share food!” she laughed. 

“No, you just take mine.”

“Uh huh. Take more, go on.”

“You are so difficult,” he said playfully. 

Kate’s response was only a raised eyebrow. _Pot calling the kettle black_. Jack finished off their plates and cleaned up after them. 

Two hours later, when mid afternoon light filtered through the blinds, Kate registered that Jack was sleeping next to her. He was mostly sitting up but still leaning against her. He breathed so quietly. Looking away from the TV, she turned her body toward his and scooted back. Supporting him, she reclined with her back on the arm of the sofa. Kate ended up cradling Jack’s upper body with her own, his head pillowed on her stomach. He stirred slightly, then wrapped his arms around her back. Kate smiled to herself and studied his face. 

Jack was not a good sleeper. On the island, it was almost impossible to wake up before or go to sleep after the doctor. He woke quickly and slept lightly, his surgical training lending itself well to the role of island leader. In the past few weeks though, Kate knew he’d been having nightmares. She heard strangled yells from his room, intermingled with the names of their friends and her own. Last night had been particularly bad. She’d actually had to rouse him to keep him rolling off the bed. Even then, he’d stared at her with unseeing eyes for a disconcerting ten seconds. 

“Hey, hey! It’s me!” she’d insisted, snapping her fingers once and not bothering to hide the concern in her voice. He took a shuddering breath and finally focused on her face. 

“Hey,” he breathed. His next move, pulling her into his lap, caught her totally off guard. Her arms went automatically around his neck and he held on for dear life. She dragged her nails through the coarse hair at the nape of his neck, syncing her breath with his. After a minute, Jack relaxed and let go of her, leaning back to look at her face. 

“ ‘M sorry. Did I wake you?” he switched seamlessly into blame mode. 

“No, I was up with Aaron and heard you. What were you dreaming about?” She’d never had the courage to ask before. 

“The boat,” he replied, not meeting her eyes. He was in danger of falling into a guilt trip. She grabbed his hand in an attempt to anchor him. 

“It’s okay. You’re here, I’m here, Aaron’s here,” she said slowly, quietly. Her patience must have lulled him because he seemed to deflate. She shuffled him backwards toward his pillows and guided him to lie down. Aaron chose that moment to wail again, pointing out his fever. Kate had spent the rest of the night, watching each of them sleep in turn. 

In the present, Kate blinked a few times to find herself being watched. Intense dark eyes stared up at her. A boyish grin broke out on Jack’s face when he realized he’d been caught. Kate smiled, biting her lower lip. 

“Welcome back,” she said softly, not guarding the affection in her voice. 

“Some TV buddy I am. Fell asleep. Sorry.”

“Don’t be. You needed to catch up. Besides, I was enjoying it. Didn’t even have to drug you.”

That comment earned her a genuine laugh. Jack lifted himself up a few inches to capture her lips in a chaste kiss. She noted that he still tasted like the sun-dried tomato sauce he favored. He settled back down on her stomach, looking up at her. She saw an idea form in his eyes a second before he said, “Let’s go out. Be spontaneous.”

Kate moved her hand from where it’d been dragging through his almost too long hair and draped it across his forehead. 

“Are you feeling okay? I think you might be catching what Aaron has,” she declared with mock sarcasm. 

“Very funny. But really. There’s a benefit for the hospital tonight. There’ll be dancing, wine, food. We could get all dressed up. Paint the town red. Leave our cocoon,” he urged, squeezing her hip and sending tingles down to her toes. 

“What if I like our cocoon?” she pleaded, pouting a little. She really did. She’d admit to occasionally being bored but life now was such a change of pace from the island and being on the run that she’d hardly noticed. The company wasn’t bad either.

Jack rolled off her and set to righting the couch cushions around Kate. When he went from calm to focused that quickly, she knew there would be no stopping him. 

She sighed, getting his attention. He gave her a look that said, “Oh, come on.” 

“Do you really want to be seen out and about with your felonious…” she grasped for a label, “roommate?” _Easiest one, nailed it_. 

“I don’t care what they think. Besides, you haven’t been convicted yet,” he smirked. 

Kate threw one of his meticulously replaced pillows at his head. 

“Ooph!” he grunted as he took the pillow to the shoulder. “That’s it!” he rushed her. 

Kate, on her haunches on the couch at first, found herself thrown over Jack’s shoulder as he walked her toward her room. She yelled in indignation when he set her down. He was so determined. He set her down and planted his hands on her shoulders. 

“I’ll take Aaron to my mom’s,” he paused as a protest rose on her lips,” She’ll love it. I’ll get a suit, you go get a nice dress".  
Before she could get a word out, he swept into her bedroom to gather Aaron’s things. In a flash, he was headed for the door with Aaron’s carrier and bag in hand. 

“Send me a picture when you find a dress. I’ll pick you up in 3 hours,” he said quickly. Jack punctuated the sentence with a quick kiss to her temple. Kate was still frozen in shock at his spontaneity. He shouted goodbye as he pulled the door open. Finally gathering herself, she yelled, “Shave!” and hoped he heard. 

After a frenzied few hours, Jack stood outside the threshold, hand poised to knock. He felt a little silly, waiting at his own door but she made him want to do things he would’ve never considered before. He finally rapped his knuckles on the hardwood. From inside, he heard a strangled yelp, followed by the sound of heels on tile.  
The lock clicked and Kate appeared in the doorway. Jack’s quick intake of breath was audible. She looked stunning in her emerald green floor length dress, her shoulders exposed and hair in an elegant bun. She wore high heels and chandelier earrings. 

Kate was similarly enchanted. Jack had stopped at an actual barbershop for a shave and trim. His black tux and green tie flattered his broad shoulders.

“You look- “, they started simultaneously and laughed. 

“Why did you knock on the door?” Kate asked, one hand raised in slight question. He caught a whiff of her subtle perfume.

“A proper date starts with a guy picking up a girl at her door, Kate,” Jack replied, creasing his brow, the corners of his mouth turning up in jest. He could not stop smiling. 

“Well, yeah. But, we’re not just a guy and a girl. And… you live here.”

“Pretend with me. Are you ready?”

“One sec. Let me grab my clutch.” 

He watched her go down the hall and return, appreciating how the dress clung to her hips. His mouth was a little dry. Kate’s eyes glinted mischievously, signaling that she knew exactly what effect she was having on him. His expression reminded her of the look she’d caught leaving the shower in the hatch. 

“The limo’s waiting downstairs,” he said when they were a few feet down the hall, trying to contain the smile that would give him away.

“You’re kidding! Jack-“she stopped herself from berating him when she saw a grin break out on his clean shaven face. 

“I’m joking. We’re taking the Bronco. Draws less attention.”

“It’s more you anyway.”

“It’s more us, Kate.”

She failed to hide her blush and let Jack lead her to his SUV with a comforting hand on her lower back. The ride over was quiet, the both of them taking turns quietly admiring the other. Once he handed the keys over to the valet, Jack took Kate’s arm and leaned down to her ear.

“You look beautiful,” he whispered, his breath hot on her neck.

“Thank you,” she said, straightening his tie with her free hand. 

Barely cognizant of the others milling around the banquet hall, Jack tucked a single wandering curl behind her ear. 

“Shall we?” he asked softly, giving her an out if she wanted it. 

Kate nodded. “This’ll be fun.” 

Jack beamed and laughed, leading her gently forward. They stepped inside and to the brunette’s surprise, there was an actual, oft-cliched sweeping staircase leading down to the main floor of the expansive hall. Jack waved down to a friendly colleague he recognized. Kate felt all eyes fall on her. It was a lot to take in for a small town girl. She saw some people whispering and Jack followed her gaze too, noticing. Big band music swelled around them. 

“Hey,” he said over the noise, placing a hand over one of hers. “Forget ‘em. Let’s have a good time.”

He leaned down to meet her, filling her vision with his familiar, comforting face. They were safe, together and no unknown terrors hid in the shadows tonight. She smiled in relief. Kate watched her feet as they went down the stairs but Jack only had eyes for her.

Safely among the other partygoers, the doctor snagged two glasses of wine and wound an arm around her waist. She looked up at him, eyebrow raised in question.  
“What? Don’t tell me you’re comfortable. Here,” he quipped, handing her a glass. 

“I don’t need a babysitter, Jack,” she replied, letting some playfulness sneak in and taking a sip of the proffered wine. In truth, she was glad to be physically connected to him, even more so as others arrived to greet Jack. He introduced her to several well-meaning colleagues who complemented them on their matching attire and even ribbed on their friend. Apparently, he hadn’t been known to bring ladies to any social events in the months preceding the crash. One even threw out the word hermit. 

“Well, I’m very particular,” he said, with a note of steadiness his voice hadn’t held before the island. With his friends smoothly hushed, he looked down at Kate who smirked in response. Discussion turned to hospital matters and she started to feel bored. She took a step away. 

“I’m just going to get some appetizers,” she said, calmly, answering the silent question on his face. “Enjoy your friends.” She slipped into the crowd.

“She is something, Jack,” a fellow surgeon commented. 

He huffed a laugh and said, “You have no idea.”

Jack watched her move through the crowd, interacting with the wait staff more easily than the other guests. He tried in vain to stay engaged in conversation but he felt compelled to keep an eye on her. 

“When are you coming back to work, Jack?” One of his closest colleagues, an orthopedic surgeon in his forties, asked. 

“Not sure. I’m not really in a rush. This leave is doing me a lot of good,” he replied earnestly. His friend cast his eyes behind him. Kate pushed her way back to Jack’s side. 

“I bet it is,” his friend added, raising his eyebrow and toasting his friend. Jack’s attention was already drawn to Kate whose hands were filled with hors' d'oeuvres. 

“I grabbed extra of what I thought you’d like,” she said, searching his eyes to find he was still in a good mood. He hummed in appreciation and tried all of them, smiling at her when he found something he enjoyed and grimacing in exaggerated disgust when he didn’t. She shoved him playfully after he mock gagged on the last one. How was it that she could make him feel like they were all alone in a crowded room? Like they were stealing bits of each other’s Chinese take out on the couch? His friends were watching but he couldn’t care less. 

“Dance with me?” he asked, holding out his hand for her. She took it without hesitation and let herself be guided to the dance floor. The music’s tempo slowed, changing to something close to a waltz. Jack pulled Kate into him as a singer started to croon an old Sinatra tune. She put her hands on his shoulders as he, in turn, wrapped his around her waist. They inched closer until their faces were a breath apart. 

Kate’s heels made her just a few inches shorter than him. She was so close. This proximity and the genuine smile on her face, without the pretense of comfort, were the real reason he’d dragged her out of the apartment. With the entire length of her body pressed against his, he could count the flecks of yellow in her eyes which drooped just a fraction. Remembering the night before, he was suddenly sorry they weren’t curled up on the couch, making up for lost sleep. She studied the new, serious set of his face and wound a hand around the nape of his neck. 

“You okay?” she asked with an edge of concern. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I just realized that you’re probably exhausted after taking care of me and Aaron all night. Let’s get out of here,” he said, as if it would be ludicrous for them to stay an extra minute. 

“You sure,” she questioned, raising an eyebrow. 

“Definitely. I feel like a zoo animal and you’re uncomfortable,” he said in his no nonsense tone, taking a step backward and reaching for her hand. 

“Thank God. This is not my scene,” she breathed out with relief, grabbing his hand and heading for the door. 

“I noticed.”

The press of the crowd forced Jack to stick very close to her back but she didn’t mind feeling him so close. He had her back. They finally burst into fresh air, breathing twin sighs of relief. Jack signaled the valet and then stood behind Kate, shielding her from the early evening breeze. 

“The only thing I miss about the tropics,” she stuttered. Jack took off his jacket, draping it over her shoulders.

“Price of beauty, I guess,” he replied, earning him an eye roll. 

Only a minute into the drive home, Kate had no idea where they were going. 

“Where are you driving us?” she asked, a quirk of curiosity in her voice. 

“You’ll see.”

Jack stopped at a gate, somewhere in the vicinity of the airport. The mustached guard on duty, clearly confused by their formal attire and the hour, open, then closed his mouth when he recognized them. 

“Fine, no funny business,” he gruffed, nodding curtly to Jack. 

Jack nodded and pulled forward. 

“Where exactly are we anyway?” Kate asked after Jack shifted the car into park. 

“LAX. That, I believe, in front of us is a run-“

A 737 roared overhead, making both of them jump in their seats. Kate’s hand shot out to grab Jack’s shoulder. Realizing it was only a plane and they were safe, they shared a nervous laugh. Kate scrambled out of the car, as best her dress would allow, and leaned against the hood. Jack took his time following, pushing play on the Bronco’s tape player. Patsy Cline filtered through the SUV’s open windows as he sauntered to the front of the car, hands in his pockets. He stopped to stand in front of her. 

“For me?” she asked, a smile reaching the corners of her eyes. Jack nodded. 

“There’s a record store next to the barber shop I went to. Budge up?”

Jack hoisted himself onto the hood of the SUV. He beckoned her forward and she turned around, leaning her back against his strong chest. Another plane raced over them. They watched it land, their hearts racing then slowing in tandem.

The night grew quiet again. Kate could feel his warmth seeping through the jacket. A few minutes passed by while they relaxed into each other. Jack rubbed a thumb in slow, nearly agonizing circles just above her hip. Kate turned to face, found his head turned toward the sky. 

“What’s really gotten into you today, Jack?” She spoke boldly, tried to be assertive but calm. She knew he’d deflect. 

Right on the money, he dropped his head and huffed out a laugh. He looked up at her through his eyelashes. 

“What, Kate? Did you not want to go out?” Jack was sidestepping her tone, the weight of the question. 

“Hey,” she said softly, bringing her hands up to either side of his neck, “You can tell me anything.”

He stared into her eyes for what seemed like an eternity, reading the trust and the start of a deeper devotion in their green depths. Her gaze held unwavering. 

“I dream of failing. Every night, Kate. I see that boat explode, hear Sun screaming. My mind fills in the gaps of what could be happening to Juliet, Locke, Sawyer, everyone else at our camp. But I woke up this morning and you were safe a foot away from me and I just…"

He broke off but Kate stayed as still as possible, not wanting to disrupt his open expression. 

“I decided to just-“ he grappled for a word, using the hand on her hip to draw her in closer, “be here. To put it all away. Look forward.” 

Jack held her eyes for a long time, pinning Kate down in silent, dare she think, commitment. She could relate to the worry and guilt he felt but she’d neither made nor broken any promises. Aside from wondering if Claire was alive to miss her son and if she should have searched harder, she didn’t feel the dull throb of failure. Kate lacked Jack’s need to fix. 

He continued his streak of surprising her, gently grabbing her chin and pulling her forward for a kiss. It started slow and sweet, then turned needy as Kate grabbed generous handfuls of his white button up. Jack’s hands scrambled for purchase on the smooth fabric of her dress, ruining his attempt to haul her into his lap. He groaned in frustration, halting his assault on her mouth. Kate took a step backward, watching his face fall. _Thinks he’s gone too far_. 

“Take me home,” she commanded. Jack’s legs went to jelly. 

“Absolutely,” he replied smoothly, a smile blooming full across his face. His eagerness seeped into the way he almost skipped to the driver side door. 

The guard barely opened the gate fast enough to let them through.


End file.
